Yo Mista!

When I left my iPhone in a cab on a Friday night, I wasn't just angry, I was disappointed. It wasn't just about the iPhone. It was also the idea that I could do something so stupid and forget something like that in the backseat of a cab. That's just not me. This depressing night actually started at a cocktail party in the Upper West Side of New York City. My wife and I arrived directly from work, so although we were dressed to impress, we had a lot of bags and things to carry. When we were ready to leave, it was really late. We hailed a cab and naturally, both of us passed in and out out of sleep in the backseat. After what seemed like forever, the driver yelled at me to wake up. I nudged my wife and asked her to go outside and open the apartment building door while I grabbed all of our bags. And that's where it all went wrong. My iPhone was resting unsecured in my dress pants pocket, and as I scooted across the backseat to get out, it must've slipped out. I not...

One of the best things about being a teacher is that Facebook, YouTube and Gmail's chat functions are blocked on all Department of Education (DOE) computers and wireless networks. This means, on a day like today, when there's absolutely no one in the building and no one taking state exams, I am literally bored out of my fucking mind. The school feels like a ghost town. One of my esteemed colleagues has taken it upon himself to enter my room any time he has to rip some serious ass. In the past four minutes, he has entered my room three times, and cranked out four (maybe six, if you count the little ones) loud, solid farts. Although, it might be more appropriate to say liquid farts judging by their sounds: some of them might've been a little wet. Pretty impressive, I'd say. Graduation is not until next Monday, so tomorrow looks to be more of the same. It's depressing: my room is barren, all the other classrooms are barren, and there are no gangster-wanna-be studen...

As per my previous post , (and other related posts here and here ) attendance has been quite shitty as of late. It makes sense, vacation is over, why would students still come to school? Duh Mista, you stupid. Mike, one of my best friends and former college roommate, happens to own a clothing company out in California by the name of Hollywood&Vain . He also recently started Queen of LaLaLand specifically for women. Anyway, Mike (being a good friend) read my previous post and reached out to me with the idea that I offer my students free graphic t-shirts from his company to students who maintain perfect attendance for x amount of days. I decide the details. He provides the graphic t-shirts. That's perfect timing. The New York State Regents are right around the corner at the end of January. Attendance is crucial right now. Most of these students are setting themselves up for failure missing important Regents preparation and review days. I'm pitching Mike's challenge...